A Project (Four Years in the Making)

Since I already work for Amazon, I figure I would publish through them, too. This is my first crack at self-publishing, even though I have been attempting for years to do it. Not going to lie, kind of just winging it and seeing how it all works while in the process. Probably not the best idea but if I sit around and think too hard on everything, I will do what I have done many times in the past and give up before I even actually try.

So, the plan is to start off with something not so big. I have a couple novels and series I want to eventually publish but none of those are anywhere near ready. I do have a short story collection that I made for a class in college some years ago. I have since then added to the collection and made it more presentable for publishing. Not completely done with the editing process but getting there.

I’m using a program from Amazon called Kindle Create, which basically takes your document and makes it e-format ready. My document did not convert perfectly, so I had to go through and make adjustments but getting it ready as far as appearance was the easy part. Now I have the struggle of proofreading a billion times, figuring out what my title is going to be, and if I dare even think about designing a cool cover for it.

So, that is what I am off to work on right now. If anyone has an idea for the title, shoot it my way. My collection is a mixture of stories about love, overcoming obstacles, acceptance, and family. Also, any tips or advice would be great as well.

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We Don’t Talk About

(A poem inspired by a couple characters from my stories)

We don’t talk about that night

A bar and a girl

The way she smirked while flirting

And the way she touched your arm

We don’t talk about the goodbye

A fight and a kiss

The way she fought the tears while yelling

And the way she tried to pull you back in

We don’t talk about the reunion

A run-in and an argument

The way she glared while walking away

And the way she treated you like a stranger

We don’t talk about the emotion

A guilt and a longing

The way she still runs around your mind

And the way you wish to have her back.

Oh, hey.

It’s been a while since I’ve done this, so I’m not exactly sure to begin. Do we start back at the beginning, when a kid in fifth grade got a compliment on a writing assignment and decided to make it her dream? Or do we go the teenager in high school with a story complete but no confidence to try and publish it. Maybe we can flash forward from that to the 20 something year old working on a story she began shortly after that fifth grade breakthrough. When she had enough confidence in herself that she turned her story, her work, in a blog that she kept running for a good while.

How many of those versions of myself would be disappointed of today’s model. Months without writing any words. Another slump, drama at home, a thousand reasons, but no real excuses. 

How many New Year’s resolutions have I broken?

I’ve lost myself for a little bit and now I’m trying to get back on track. I miss the writing. I miss the blogging. I miss the other bloggers. I miss being a part of a community of people who like to share their stories and ideas with the world. 

So here I am.

Welcome home, don’t be a stranger again.

Since it’s been so long, I almost feel like I need to start from scratch. 

But where to begin?

Politics

I’m not really big on politics. I’ll be te last person to tell you so-and-so should be the next President because that is a statement I have no support for as I ignore the elections. I have long since learned its all a big poularity contest and the right person for the job doesn’t always win. What I do know is the person who became President a couple of days ago is a joke- a reality TV star. Millions of people protested around the world because those people understand how ridiculous this all is.

I wouldn’t care much about it. Except for the fact that any utterance of LGBT rights disappeared from the White House webpage and now Republicans in Texas are trying reverse same-sex marriage spousal rights. I’m sure some people will tell me I’m worried about nothing. But little things like this do worry me. The past decade has seen lots of progress for not only LGBT rights, but human rights as well. 

But now that someone seemingly (or actually literally) with no regard or compassion towards minorities, women, etc, is in charge, our last line of defense is not someone in power. It’s American citizens. Yesterday showed me that if my rights become threatened, there are a number of people who will help fight to protect them.

But still, I worry if that will be enough..

When You Pour a Glass of Wine….

…And somehow end up drink the entire bottle.

So not my intention. It was at least a cheap $3 bottle of wine from Aldi’s. If you don’t know what Aldi’s is, you’re missing out. With nearly an entire bottle of wine now in my system, I remember I have laundry to finish putting up and a “homework” assignment to get done for work. 

Speaking of work, tomorrow will be a big day. Managers are rotating around, which is a normal thing in retail if you stay long enough to notice. My “new” manager is one I have worked closely with already so it isn’t too much of a change. I think he is really pining on me getting promoted (with his help), so he’s been pushing me to do everything I need before it was official that he was becoming my boss. 

So, we’ll see how that goes.

I am in a place right now that getting promoted is not that important as a financial level, it’s more of something to challenge me more. I only worry about it taking too much time away from my family. Before we moved here from San Diego, I did not get as much time with my family and I would hate to fall into that again. But it’s a job that has four-day shifts each week besides peak season, so it shouldn’t be as crazy becoming a manager.

In other news, I am trying to get back into my writing. I feel like I type those words more than my actual work. Now that I’m getting older, it bothers me more and more every year I fail to publish something. Hopefully this is my year. 

Well, I have some cleaning to do and laundry. Forcing myself bacjcinto blogging, so I apologize if these first set of posts aren’t very engaging.

Deja Vu Gaming: Resident Evil 5

My sister-in-law got an Xbox 360 from my wife and I nearly a year ago. She’s finally gotten to the point of using it for more than Netflix and Hulu and asked for video game recommendations from me. We took a trip to GameStop and I found a remastered version of Resident Evil 5. I offered my sister-in-law my old 360 copy if she liked the game. That began a week-long journey and replaying a great game with a new player to the series, which was both fun and tedious.

Anyone who knows me well enough knows I play games with the intent of discovering everything. My sister-in-law does not share the same attitude. She did well at first helping me track down treasure and ammo but she soon got overwhelmed by boredom or chose to run from enemies rather than stick it out for better rewards. I’ll admit, having nearly ten Lickers chasing you down a narrow hallway can be intimidating, but it’s a challenge I choose to see through. 

Anyone who played RE5 on 360 and enjoyed Versus and the DLC missions will be happy to know it’s an included in the Xbox One remaster. The game itself is just as great as ever. I played the game on 360 several times and the replayable value still exists strongly. (RE4 is also another great title- plays the best of the Wii.) 

Here’s a clip of my adventure replaying this game with my sister-in-law. She had some trouble with the random command prompts (she’s player 2, or Sheva).

New Year, Rough Start

The months of November and December zipped by in a chaos mess of intense 60 hours work weeks and endless nights of terrible dreams about packages not getting shipped out in time. Working at a retail store during Black Friday and throughout Christmastime is one type of madness and working at a fulfillment center is another kind. I managed to lose 15 pounds despite eating too much junk and sipping Coke as much as I did water. 

It could have also helped that I was sick the week of Thanksgiving and in recovery for the two weeks following (which I’m not sure how I survived looking back on it). 

I had looked forward to starting a new year with a better start then the previous year had ended. And, of course, on New Year’s Eve I started to develop another bad cough much like the one I had just beat two weeks prior. 

But these things happen, and I would take being sick for three months if it meant my daughter wouldn’t have gotten sick this go around. Sleepless nights with a toddler is not ideal. 

I think the worst of it is over though. I hope so. This first winter in like, six years, is not as exciting as I thought it would be. 

Except the snow. The snow was awesome.

For You, For Us, For Humanity. Please Share

Linda G. Hill

On this, November 11th, the day we remember the people who have given their lives  for their countries, I find the disparity between the ultimate in self-sacrifice and the continuing reports of disrespect and lack of empathy discouraging. I had a discussion on Facebook this morning with a man who told me that his daughter-in-law had been verbally accosted in a store while holding her 18-month-old child; there are so very many reports such as this and even worse coming in, it almost makes me want to hide. But I won’t, because there is something I can do.

For all the people who lack empathy in the world, I believe there are more who understand that we all have our struggles. And whether we deem them bigger than ours or not, a struggle is a struggle. An exhausted single mother washing her own dishes in an effort to control something

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An Open Letter to My Fellow Americans

The Random Ramblings and Musings of a Kat

To My Fellow Democrats/Liberals: I understand that you are scared and uncertain what this presidency is going to hold for you. Trust me. I had a hard time stopping the tears on Wednesday. It’s scary for us. As a gay woman, I completely understand. The American people have elected someone that has shown very appalling behavior. We don’t know if our rights will be protected. We are afraid for our lives and safety as others have now put into action what the President-Elect has talked about during his rallies.

This is where I’m going with this: After I’ve dried my tears and let myself feel angry and hurt and disappointed, I started listening. I started to really, really open my ears. I started having a conversation with people who voted for Trump. Listening to why they did what they did. It really was eye opening. In our fight for equality…

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NaNoWriMo 2016

I haven’t particpated in Nano for some years and although this year I am not sure if I am going to give it a try, I do want to finish one of my works I have been trying to publish. I recently went through my writing folder on my computer and there are a handful of ideas that I still would love to finish working on (but not until after I publish a few that are pretty much near completion). 

Who else is participating in NaNo this year?